Love in disguise
by secret identity03
Summary: Blah blah blah, Sakura falls in love with Lee, gets in a disguise, goes out with him, more blah, other characters fall in love too. leexSakura NejixTenten ShimaruxIno HinataxNaruto maybe some OC pairings?
1. Chapter 1: Room one

**Love in disguise**

**Chapter 1**

**Rated: T for 13 and up**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Get over it.**

Hi! This is my first fanfic (or is it?). It's meant to be a romance funny thingy, mainly about my favorite: Sakura x Lee. But it ended up having a lot of other pairings in it, too, so… oh, well, it's still kinda funny. If you read the first chapter, there's not really anything happening 'cause I'm just getting started, but the other chapters will be better and I'll put them up as soon as I can.

Sakura walked down the road slowly looking for Sasuke, but he was nowhere to be seen. So, she stopped and asked a few people, and none of them new either. That's when she saw Ino running down the sidewalk carrying a beautiful flower. Of course, she automatically assumed it was for Sasuke and ran after Ino in a rage.

"INO- PIG!" she screamed as she chased her rival down the road.

Ino twirled around, shouting "BILLBOARD BROW!" in response.

Then the two girls proceeded to scratch and claw at each other. When they were finished they began arguing again.

"Ino," began Sakura, panting "where are you going? Is that for Sasuke? Where is he? Stay away from him!"

Ino was also panting. "I don't know where Sasuke is you jerk, what do you take me for, a stalker? This is for Shikamaru! I'm meeting Chouji at the hospital to visit him!"

Sakura did one of those 'DING!' surprised movements and froze.

"W- What?" she stammered.

"Didn't you hear?" Ino asked, shocked. "Something happened last night…"

"What? What?"

"Well… I don't know exactly, but something went down! Several Genins were involved; there was an attack… and invasion or something."

"What attack? What invasion?"

"Like I said, Sakura I don't know! Get it together! If you want you can come with me and Chouji. We're going to see who else got hurt, too."

"…Uh, yeah… okay, thanks…"

"It's not real bad or anything. Just a few scratches. They said something about Sand… come to think of it; maybe it wasn't an invasion… Oh, well. Shikamaru would know. Come on! Chouji's probably stuffing himself to pass the time, and if he gets any fatter he might explode!"

"Yeah…"

But, as Sakura followed Ino to the hospital she wasn't exactly thinking about Chouji's fatness. What was going on?

As they entered the building, Sakura saw something familiar out of the corner of her eye.

"Kakashi, sensei?" she asked as she ran over.

"Sakura?" he asked in return. "What are you doing hear… Oh. I guess you heard."

"Kakashi, sensei, what's going on? Was there an attack? An invasion? What does it have to do with Sand? Where's--"

"Whoa, whoa, one thing at a time." Kakashi said, a bit overwhelmed by all the questions.

Just then, Ino and Chouji ran up.

"Sakura, did he tell you? What's happened?" Ino asked quickly.

"Well, girls…" Kakashi began "…it was an attack. But not by Sand. This was done by a new enemy… an unknown enemy… they began attacking the village, so all the Jonins and some of their Genin students retaliated. The Chunins joined in later on. They're a bit… well… testy upon waking... so the Genins did their job for a bit, and it resulted in many injuries, but none serious. They should be okay by Friday. Just so you know today is Wednesday."

"Really? Who attacked? Who's the enemy? Which Genins where involved?" Sakura asked as soon as Kakashi stopped. "AND YES, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WE KNOW IT'S WEDNESDAY!"

"The attacker went by the name of I.C. Yuin Thesh Ower. He disappeared after killing a Chunin and left the rest to his little army of 'Sneaky Peaky' ninjas, as he called them. They weren't very strong, so Konoha doesn't consider him much of a threat… yet. The Genins involved were… uh… I think… I don't know actually! I'm sure the nurse over there by the front desk will, though. All I know is that Naruto was there…"

"… Of course…" finished Sakura.

"… He actually beat 5 of the foreign ninja before we stepped in. He's maturing quite well as a fighter…" Kakashi added.

"And Sasuke?" asked Ino.

"… He wasn't there. He was at a meeting." Kakashi replied.

"A… meeting?" Sakura said strangely.

Chouji spoke for the first time. "What kind of meeting?"

"A confidential meeting. Something about a plan to burn all purple socks or something like that…" Kakashi said with a grin.

"Uh… okay…" Sakura said, a bit freaked out.

"Anyway, come on Sakura! Let's see who's here!" Ino shouted running ahead.

"Sure! Here I come!" Sakura replied running after her.

Eventually, Chouji made it to the desk, too, panting.

"Um, excuse me nurse but do you know the names of all the Genin involved last night?" asked Ino politely.

The nurse pulled out a binder and flipped through it. "Yes… let's see… here we are!... Just their first names? Um… Shikamaru, Tenten, Kiba, Shino, Naruto, Neji, and Lee. Why? Would you like to see them? All of them?"

Sakura was shocked to find that, besides Hinata and Chouji, Sakura and Ino were, like, the only ones NOT there. And… were they all okay?

"Sure," Ino replied. "We're all friends, right?"

"Well, lucky for you we managed to fit three per room! Well, except for the girl, we had to put her in with some other ladies…"

"Yeah…" said Ino.

"Okay then," said the nurse getting up from her desk "follow me!"

Each of them followed her down the hall and were surprised to see Hinata along the way.

"Hinata?" Sakura said as she saw the shy girl walk past.

"Um…" Hinata replied, fiddling with her fingers. "I w- was um… looking for my teammates…"

"Right this way!" said the nurse with a grin. (Was she on drugs or something?)

So, now the party of four (and I mean that literally, 'cause they randomly started doing the electric slide, except Hinata) continued down the hall toward room 333 (lots of threes, yay!).

"In here are Naruto, Kiba, and Shino," she said as she opened the door.

As they entered, they noticed that the room was very quiet… too quiet.

"BOO!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"

Naruto jumped out of a pile of cardboard boxes on the floor and shouted 'boo'. The girl's natural response was a shrill scream.

"N- NARUTO!" Sakura shouted back in a rage.

"Ha ha!" Naruto pointed at the nurse. "That's what you get for not serving ramen!"

"Grrr…" the nurse replied, coming out of her 'happy' stage. "UZUMAKI NARUTO! You should be ashamed! How dare you—all because of _instant noodles_!"

"HEY!" Naruto said in return "_Don't_ insult the sacred soup of champions!"

"And look what you did to poor Kiba and Shino! They're all tied up!" the nurse said with shock.

Looking to the back of the room, the girls saw Shino and Kiba both lying on their beds with socks in their mouths and ropes tied around them. They were squirming wildly.

"…They were gonna tell…" Naruto whined.

"And I was going to order take out ramen tonight!" the nurse said running over to the two boys. "But after what you did I think I'll have to change my mind…"

"NOOOOOOO!" Naruto screamed, jumping on her. "PLEASEEEEEE! ONE MORE CHANCE!"

"Ah!" the nurse replied. "Yes, fine, but get off of me! And DON"T DO IT AGAIN!"

Naruto was off before you could say 'noodle'. "Yes m'am!"

The nurse untied Kiba and Shino and left the Genins only, saying she'd be back in 5 minutes.

"So, wassup?" Naruto asked dumbly, staring at the four new additions to the room.

"YOU DUMBY!" Sakura yelled. "WE CAME TO SEE YOU!"

Naruto blushed. "Really?"

"NOT JUST YOU! EVERYONE INVOLVED LAST NIGHT! YOU'RE NOT SPECIAL!" Sakura yelled back.

"Oh…" Naruto said, looking toward the ground.

Sakura realized that in her anger she had said the wrong thing.

"Naruto…" she said, grabbing his shoulder. "I'm sorry… I didn't mean it. I was just angry about your little sneak attack. Everyone's special somehow…"

She was mad at herself. Really. She knew she was mean to Naruto too often for nothing, and, not that she loved him or anything, but she didn't want to hurt him. Despite everything, she thought of him as a friend.

Naruto perked up instantly. "Thanks! Anyway, me and my buds were just foolin' around…"

"… we hate you at the moment…" Kiba said.

Shino, of course, didn't say anything.

"So…" said Chouji, trying to break the ice. "How are you?"

"We're good," said Kiba. "I don't understand we we're here though… we're all fine… well, except for…"

"Except for who?" asked Ino quickly.

"… Well, Lee got it pretty bad. Heard he beat a Jonin." Kiba finished.

The 'DING!' again. Sakura was worried… and she didn't know why. Lee was her friend, of course, but this felt… different.

"How is he?" she asked.

"Well…" replied Kiba "not THAT bad… some pretty big cuts, but he should heal."

"Wow…" said Ino. "…A Jonin… He's strong."

"Yeah…" said Shino out of nowhere. Silence. "Is something wrong Hinata?"

Hinata was shivering in a corner, unnoticed.

"A- are you sure you guys are okay?" she asked shyly.

"Don't worry! You always do that," said Kiba in reply. "Of course we're okay."

Sakura had to agree. They only had a few bandages on.

"Hey, Hinata I barely saw you!" said ignorant Naruto.

Hinata blushed fiercely. She was as red as a tomato.

"HINATA!" Naruto cried out. "I think you've just gotten an enormous fever! Don't move! I'll get a cold compress!"

He ran over to the sink, wet a cloth, ran back over to Hinata, and smacked it on her head. She went even redder.

"Whoa, I think you might need to be the one in the hospital!" he said frantically.

"No, Naruto!" said Sakura. "She's just blushing!"

Naruto blinked. "Blushing? Why?"

Hinata started to sweat.

"Uh… because…" Sakura didn't want to give away Hinata's obvious secret (known by everyone but Naruto), so she turned to Kiba. DING! "Because she's embarrassed by Kiba over there, picking his nose!"

Everyone turned.

"Hey, I'm not picking my nose!" Kiba shouted back. (He really wasn't).

"Don't deny it!" Sakura said, winking at him.

"Ohhhhhhhh…" he said, starting to understand. "THAT kind of picking… Boy, aren't I disgusting? She has a right to be embarrassed!"

Everyone gave a sigh of relief.

"…Ewww…" Naruto cringed. "Keeping your gold mining to yourself, dude… GROSS!"

…

"So, anyone know how to split this flower three ways?" Ino asked.

And they got to work with scissors.

"Be careful!" shouted Chouji.

"Yeah…" said Sakura.

In a minute, Ino held up the finished… pieces.

"Here," she said putting one third in a vase and shoving it at Shino "you guys get the ugliest part."

"Heyyy…" Naruto whined.

Just then the door opened.

"Okay," said the once again cheery nurse, sticking her head through the door crack "next room!"

Until next time, I'll be eating mint pizza. And I have another name on Fanfiction but no one will ever find out… muwahaha!


	2. Chapter 2: Room two

OK guys, I don't know how to say this but… I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THIS FIC! I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO sorry and I really hope you keep reading cuz I love all four of your reviews! (that's how many I have at the moment and I'm really happy with it!) THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN! I WILL TRY MY VERY VERY BEST! I WON'T FORGET THIS TIME! LAST TIME I GOT CAUGHT UP IN SCHOOL BECAUSE I JUST WENT TO A NEW SCHOOL BUT NOW I HAVE MORE FREE TIME TO WRITE THIS FIC!

Click here for more apologies: copy and paste the link in the review of this chap I made.

* * *

The next room was Tenten's room, 334. She greeted them with a smile (WARNING: I KNOW that Tenten is OOC, but I just like her this way). The nurse left with another 5 minute warning. 

"Hey, guys!" she grinned. "I SO wasn't expecting you! Thanks sooo much! I really appreciate it!"

They four nodded. "Anyti--" Sakura began before stopping mid speech.

Sitting in the bed next to Tenten's bedwas... KIN!

"K- KIN!" They all (except Tenten) exclaimed at once. She looked up and smiled at them (WARNING: MAJOR OOC -ness with Kin...). "Howdy!"

"B- But..." Sakura stuttered after a moment's shocked silence."You DIED!"

Kin paused and thought for a moment. "Oh yeah..." she said without care. "See ya in heaven then!" Then she started floating upward.

...silence...

...awkward...

...more silence...

"What did YOU ever do to get to heaven!" Ino finally questioned with annoyance.

"Haha. I volunteered atthe 'Inter National Cat Lady Everlasting Retirementhome' silly!" Kin replied with a giggle.

...more silence...

"Excuse me, but 'retirement home' is two seperate words... and international is one..." Sakura stated, confused.

"Yeah, but Garaa likes the word 'INCLER'," Kin replied.

...again, the oh so annoying silence...

"GAARA!" Ino suddenly screamed. "What!"

Kin looked puzzled. "You mean you don't know? He owns the place! Who DOESN'T know about INCLER? I mean, they're totally famous..."

"O...K...?" Chouji said.

"Well, bye!" and then Kin disappeared in a blinding flash of light.

"That was SO creepy," Tenten stated the obvious.

"Hmmm..." Chouji mumbled. "We'll have to investigate this 'INCLER'..."

"Yeah! What kind of word is INCLER? I mean really!"

"It's in the dictionary," Chouji said pulling a dictionary out of his pants. "Def; INCLER: A random not-even-a-word-but-is-one-now-because-Gaara-will-kill-me-if-I-don''t-put-it-in-here word made up by the Great Wizard of Shawl Street, Gaara. (He is a world-known shawl collector and has been in many fashion shows. He named the street.)."

"One:" Ino began, "you had a dictionary IN YOUR PANTS!"

"Doesn't everyone?" Chouji asked innocently.

"...Um... well... two: The Wizard of SHAWL STREET! SHAWL COLLECTOR! FASHION SHOWS!... what?"

"Um, could someone PLEASE write a list of things we are supposed to do/know/have? Like INCLER? And the dictionary pants?"

"Sure! I already have a novel out for that one!" Chouji said.

"WHAT!" Ino shrieked. "People are SO wierd..."

"Anyway," Sakura said, turning around facing Tenten. "We brought you a flower third!"

"How, sweet--" Tenten stopped mid sentence out of confusion. "Wait- flower THIRD?"

"SO WE COULDN'T AFFORD A **WHOLE** FLOWER!"Chouji roared out of nowhere, having a little meltdown."WHAT WITH THE CHILDREN, AND THE UNEMPLOYMENT, AND THE **CEREAL BOX WE LIVE IN**, WE SAVED UP SPECIAL JUST FOR THAT THIRD OF A FLOWER! AND YOU DON'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT! OUR CHILDREN SHAKE IN THE NIGHT AND ASK 'ARE WE GONNA DIE, DADDY?' AND YOU DON'T EVEN **THANK** US! **GARBAGE!** ALL OF IT! **I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY!" **

... extremely random shocked creeped out scared annoying silence...for a LONG time...

"Just had to get that off my chest," Chouji said taking a deep breath. "Continue."

"Um..." Ino said.

"...OK now..." Sakura added.

"Um... well... thank you so much anyway. This really does mean a lot to me!" Tenten said with cheer.

"You're welcome!" they all said.

"So... what really happened on your end? With the fight?" Hinata asked politely.

"Oh!" Tenten 'DING'ed. "Yeah... well this really creepy guy I.C. Yuin Thesh Ower came and actually tried to use OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOWERS! While reading Icha Icha paradise! And his minons were just creepy... but one of them was strong. A Jonin. The one Lee beat."

"...Whoa..." Sakura said. "Thanks for the info!"

"Yeah sure..." Tenten hesitated "and... I'd like you guys to have this. Make sure you share it with all the Konoha genin and those other three genin from Suna and then give it back to me in like a year or whatever. I'm always on the sidelines- but Ireally want to be more in this story and I really want to be a better friend so... let's start with this stuff about me, okay?"

She handed Sakura a beatiful notebook. It was pretty large, the size of an average dictionary (not as thick though) and had glittery pink on the front with lots of decorations like flowers and stickers and her glittery name in silver and LOTS of other things. They could only imagine the inside.

"Wow... it's beautiful," Ino said.

"Thanks," Tenten replied. "It's kind of like my diary, only not as secret and personal 'no one can ever find this out' kind of stuff. It even has... my surname. If you all read it I think we'll be closer. And I want that, really."

"Thanks so much..." They all said.

"You're welcome!"

In came the nurse (She does spoil things doesn't she? Rotten nurse! Now I need to end the chapter!). It was time to go to the final room.

"Tell everyone I said hi!" Tenten shouted after them.

And the door closed.

* * *

Thanks so much! Once again, really sorry but I hope you keep reviewing because I love to read them! And I'm really sorry for the spelling and grammarerrors! Also, if I am spelling Jonin wrong (whichI know I probablyam, almostSURELY am actually,sorry!), someone please tell me how to spell it right please?And I am going to make it a thing where they read some of that book Tenten gave them each time. I'm so sick of her not having much of a character part! Sorry about the shortness! And more on Sasuke and the purple socks! And more of I.C. Yuin Thesh Ower! And they're gonna investigate INCLERafter the final room, too!Till next time! 


	3. Chapter 3: Room three

Chapter three- YAY! I hope this one ends up longer than the other one. Thanks for your reviews! I HEART ROCK LEE! By the way, in my fic they are all thirteen... except Gai's team. I guess they'd be fourteen, then right?

* * *

As they entered the next room, they were shocked to find no one was in there! Or... wait... 

"There's no one-- " Ino got cut off by a loud grunt.

They looked up.

"Please get of the ceiling you three," said the nurse, annoyed.

Shikamaru, Neji, and Lee were all using funky little inventions to cling to the ceiling (instead of chakra). Shikamaru had suction cups on his hands and feet. Neji had a really big vaccum cleaner-type thing in reverse mode and was dangling from it. Finally, Lee (who was covered in bandages) was... BITING the ceiling...! HUH?

"Mrufffscrff olichhhhmmmer!" Lee tried to say.

"We're having a 'who's-hanging-from-the-ceiling-invention-is-best contest! We spend all our extra boring time here making them... and, well... Lee practiced biting the whole time..." Shikamaru informed them.

"Fermurrrrrrm! Fffolikch!" Lee exclaimed. He meant- 'That's my dedication! True geniuses need strong jaws!'

"Oh, jeez..." the nurse sighed. "I hoped I wouldn't have to use this..."

She took out a giant spatula from her pants and scraped them all off, then flipped them like flap jacks.

BAM!

They all hit the floor with a smack and said 'Ow!'

"LEE!" Sakura shouted before thinking and ran over to him.

Everyone stared.

"Um... I mean... LEE! How dare you do that to the ceiling!" She saved herself with, thinking quick. "I work here, and now I have to probably get paid less since they need to fix it!"

"S- sorry Sakura-san..." he replied guiltiliy.

All Sakura really wanted to do at that moment was sit down next to him and give him a hug. But she beat herself up for it. Why did she suddenly feel this way? About LEE! I mean, she liked SASUKE!...Right? Then why was she feeling this way... I mean, in the past Sakura would definitly of said 'EWWWWWWW!' at even the JOKE of her liking Lee, but... now... she didn't feel that way at all. And it scared her. And made her really mad! This is NOT supposed to happen! But... she couldn't help herself...

Her expresion became softer. This was just a phase. She'd pass through it in no time. "Here, Lee," she said offering her hand. "Sorry about that... really. I overreacted. I'm not mad! I work at the hospital because I CARE anyway, not for money. And you're my friend..."

He smiled as she helped him up. "Thanks a bunch Sakura!" he exclaimed with the cutest little grin she had ever seen!

'Wait... NOT CUTE!' she thought.'Just... regular!'

'(ly cute)' inner Sakura countered (making 'regularly cute').

"GRRRRR!" she growled out loud.

"Well SOMEONE's moody today..." Ino commented with a smirk.

"Shut up, Ino- pig..." said Sakura calming down.

'Phase. Phase. It's only a phase.' Sakura thought.

'That's what you THINK!' Inner Sakura here.

"And WHY is there a spatula in your pants?" Ino asked the nurse.

"Haven't you read Chouji's novel? Everyone does..."

"Ugh..." Ino mumbled.

Then the nurse left.

"I- I better leave, too!" Sakura stuttered, moving toward the door.

"Oh no, you don't! We're staying! We just got here!" Ino said grabbing her.

"But... alright," Sakura agreed.

"Soooooooooo... you beat a Jonin?" Chouji asked Lee.

"Aw, yeah but seriously," Lee said modestly "no big deal!"

"You have so many bandages..." Hinata commented.

"Only for small cuts!" Lee said happily.

'He. Is. So. CUTE!' Inner Sakura thought. 'And he could be YOURS in a heartbeat! He loves you already and you know it!'

"Shut up!" Sakura said, meaning it for herself. Then she realized that Lee and gang had heard and thought it was intended for him. He looked at the ground.

"Oh- no!" Sakura started grabbing his shoulders. "No! I didn't mean that for you Lee! It's just that the voice in my head is distracting me and I really want to hear what you and everyone has to say!"

Lee seemed very convinced and smiled up at her. "Thanks, Sakura!"

"No problem!" she replied, grinning.

"So... are you... okay, guys?" Hinata asked shyly.

"We're fine... stop worrying," Neji said (he's not mean anymore, this is after episode... whatever it was that I am not going tospoil. The episode he and naruto fight).

"Well, we brought you a third of a flower anyway!" Ino said cheerily.

"A thir-" Neji began.

"And if you don't appreciate it Chouji will blow up and go on about dying children and a cereal box," Ino added quickly.

"Uh..." Neji (like Shikamaru and Lee) was confused. "O...K... it's... so thougthful?"

"Finally someone who appreciates it..." Chouji sighed.

"But why only a third?" Shikamaru asked.

Chouji took a deep breath in preparation.

"Oh no..." Ino said, covering her ears.

"SO WE COULDN'T AFFORD A **WHOLE** FLOWER!"Chouji roared again, having another meltdown."WHAT WITH THE CHILDREN, AND THE UNEMPLOYMENT, AND THE **CEREAL BOX WE LIVE IN**, WE SAVED UP SPECIAL JUST FOR THAT THIRD OF A FLOWER! AND YOU DON'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT! OUR CHILDREN SHAKE IN THE NIGHT AND ASK 'ARE WE GONNA DIE, DADDY?' AND YOU DON'T EVEN **THANK** US! **GARBAGE!** ALL OF IT! **I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY!" **

...extremely random shocked creeped out scared annoying silence...for a LONG time... again...

"Just had to get that off my chest," Chouji said taking a deep breath. "Again. Continue."

"Uh..." Neji said.

"...Wow..." Shikamaru added.

"Really... thank you so much anyway. This really does mean a lot to us!" Lee said quickly.

"You're welcome!"Chouji replied.

"So..." Hinata began. "Want to read some of the book Tenten gave us?"

"Yeah!" Ino exclaimed, grabbing the book out of Sakura's pink backpack.

"Wow..." Shikamaru said.

"What is this exactly?" Neji asked.

"It's a notebook about Tenten," Sakura said. "Here I'll quote her: 'I'd like you guys to have this. Make sure you share it with all the Konoha genin and those other three genin from Suna and then give it back to me in like a year or whatever. I'm always on the sidelines- but I really want to be more in this story and I really want to be a better friend so... let's start with this stuff about me, okay? It's kind of like my diary, only not as secret and personal 'no one can ever find this out' kind of stuff. It even has... my surname. If you all read it I think we'll be closer. And I want that, really.'"

"...Wow..." Lee said, baffled.

"We HAVE to read it!" Neji said excitedly.

"OK... let's go!" Sakura said opening it.

The first page was... blank. The next page said: this belongs to Tenten.

On the NEXT page however, there was information about Tenten like her birthday (March 9), age (14), etc.

On the page after that there were pictures. The page was very sparkley and glittery and decorated with a hospital bracelet your baby has on its wrist when you take ithome. The first was of Tenten as a new born baby. The page had wrtten on it:

'When my parents brought me home from Konaha hospital for the first time. I was a small Chinese baby. Yes, I am CHINESE not japanese, but my parents came over from China to Japan and became ninja. My grandmother is very Chinese (she lives with us) and tells me stories about my origin all the time. One of my faves is her story: 'The dragon of rain"! More on that next time!

Tenten

"That's cool..." Neji seemed very interested. (why?...)

They shut the book in a snap when the door opened and the nurse came in.

"OK, time to go..." she told the four guests (Sakura, Chouji, Hinata, and Ino).

"OK..." they replied.

And with one final glance at Lee (with an unwanted blush), Sakura, the last one to exit, closed the door.

* * *

OK, now I can get into the action! OK, if anyone has any ideas about what to put in Teten's book, please tell me because I am a bit lost. 


	4. Chapter 4: The chicken fight

Ugh. I'm sorry it took me awhile to get this out. School haunts me even in the summer. I go to a stupid private school and I get homework over the summer. HARD homework. There were originally six things I needed to do for homework. I have one remaining. THEN I went on a week long vacation and well… I don't have a laptop so I couldn't update. Really I am sorry… So I promise I will update when I can! Thanks for reviewing!

rockLeelover and 'A'lusy: I LOVE your ideas and I am so going to use them (since they are both kind of the same)! Thanks!

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What Sakura DIDN'T realize was that she had left Tenten's book in the room. Neji noticed this just after the door closed and was about to yell after the four, but for some reason he REALLY wanted to read it. All of it. Right that second.

So he picked up the book and snuck it under the covers of his bed. He covered himself and the book up and began to read...

_This is gonna be good!_ he thought as he turned the page.

The page turned...

_Dear bookie,_

At this Neji stopped for a moment. _Bookie?_ he thought. _That is so Tenten._ Afterall, he did know her better then the other Genin. Not MUCH better, but better none the less.

_Dear bookie,_

_Hiiiiiiii... today I am happy! You know why? Because I am a happy person, that's why! I love life! ...OK, I'm not THAT happy... but still happy! Because Grandma Huifeng is coming for a visit tommorow! She is very wise and tells me ancient stories... I love it when she comes! She seems to have her own magical power, if that's possible. She's just so... DIFFERENT... in a good way. When I'm old, I wanna be just like her! Anyway, I'd better go! I have to help my parents prepare for her arrival!Bye!_

_Love always, Tenten _

Neji closed the book. He didn't want anyone else seeing it. He would read ALL OF IT! _Muahahahahhahahahahahha!_

He didn't realize he was laughing out loud. VERY out loud. When he pushed the book under his pillow and pulled the covers off, he noticed Lee and Shikamaru standing over him.

"Uh..." he began.

"Um, Neji?" asked Lee very sweetly. "Do you maybe want us to schedule an appointment for you? You know, to talk to someone... like a psychiatrist?"

"I'm just gonna walk away..." Shikamaru said cautiously backing up.

"No, no!" Neji replied quickly. "It's ok, really, I'm fine! Heh heh..."

"You don't seem fine," Lee stated looking at Neji's psychotic grin.

"WAHHHHHHHHHH WAHHHHHHHHH!" That's when Neji lost it.

He started acting like a monkey and swung from the cieling all over the place. Then he randomly started chucking chicken nuggets at Shikamaru and Lee.

"THE HORROR!" Lee screamed with drama, falling to his knees.

Shikamaru just stood there like 'wtf?' and then walked out of the room.

By now the room was filled up to three feet tall with chicken nuggets from McDonald's. Yes, Neji was a McDonald's fan. A BIG McDonald's fan. Not that he would ever admit it. He was sooooooo anti Burger King. And he somehow had an endless supply of McDonald's chicken nuggets in his pocket at all times.

Lee was sobbing as he lay on the chicken nuggets. He began going up and up on the increasing amount of nuggets at a quicker and quicker speed.

THIS WAS SURELY THE END!

But then... out of nowhere...

came...

Shikamaru, the Burger King enthusiast!

"EAT THIS, SCUM!" Shikamaru shouted at the top of his lungs.

Then he began throwing chicken TENDERS at NEJI. Lee just lay there staring at them as if they were insane... which they were. His mouth humg open in shock.

The two enemies threw chicken wildly across the room! There were several injuries...

"FOR BURGER KING! GO TENDERS!" shouted Shikamaru as he hurled a six piece combo at Neji.

"FOR MCDONALD'S! GO NUGGETS!" Neji yelled in response and threw a four piece combo WITH FRIES at Shikamaru.

Poor Lee. Since his mouth was hanging open in shock, it was soon filled with chicken.His eyes popped out of head (not really, just got really big I mean) as he choked on the chicken. Within seconds he was buried in nuggets and tenders. WHO WOULD PREVAIL?

**Back in room one, with Naruto, Kiba, and Shino...**

"OOO AHH!... OOO AHH!" Naruto sang with a grin.

Kiba stretched out his arms and grinned as well as he sang. "ONLY AT MATRESS GIANT!"

"OOO AHH!" Shino finnished with no emotion at all.

"Aw, come on Shino, man!" Kiba turned to his quiet friend. "If we're EVER gonna fulfill our secret dreams to sing the 'matress giant' commercial on the radio you have to put more FEELING into it! Tryouts are in 2 DAYS!"

"Alright then, once more from the top!" Shino replied.

... Do you really want to hear this? ... OK, then I'll skip back to the nuggets and tenders fight...

**Back in room three...**

Now the room was filled to the ceiling with nuggets and tenders! But even though they were buried, Shika and Neji kept on tossing the chicken and... well...

The door burst open and the hallway began flooding with chicken. People screamed. Some jumped out the windows (this is only a one story hospital, people, so they did NOT die or even get hurt). Some ran and screamed. Some fell to the floor sobbing. Some actually began eating the chicken... hey, chicken floods don't happen every day you know! And it was FREE!

In room two Tenten and the old lady were buried and almost drowned in chicken, but then they began eating it and soon got some air.

In room three they stopped rehearsing for the matress giant tryouts and just fell to the floor eating the chicken as soon as the door burst open (yes, even Shino. People don't know this but he LOVES chicken).

The hospital flooded and lets just say all Konaha Genin were kicked out... and banned...

So they were rushed to the Suna (sand) hospital in an ambulence. Once they were in their rooms they laid down and waited for the doctor.

"Doctor IamOFF THECHAIN will be with you momentarily," the nurse told them and then left the room.

They were all in the same room this time. All glaring at Neji.

Suddenly the door creaked...

and in came...

...GAARA!

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You may or may not have heard of McDonald's and Burger King. It depends on where you live. Basically, they are fast food places. Some other examples are Wendy's, Hardees, Arby's (not really a fast food place but close), White Castle, Roy Rogers, ect. I wrote this because I thought there was NO DIFFERENCE between chicken nuggets and chicken tenders, but apparently there is, according to my cousin...  
Also, you probably haven't heard it but that 'ooh ah, matress giant' thing was from a real commercial. I hear it where I live on the radio all the time. They sell matresses.


	5. Chapter 5: The doctor's diagnosis

Omg like I totally forgot about this fic… I'm so sorry!!! I was just so busy and… oh well no excuses! Back to business! The show must go on!! You came to read a fanfic and a fanfic you shall get!! I've started this fic and now I will finnish it!! Prepare to face the power of my pen!!!... Actually no, the power of my keyboard! Muwahahhaha!!!!

Now to start where we left off…

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Suddenly the door creaked...

and in came...

...GAARA!

Everyone gasped.

Because not only was it Gaara… er, I mean Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN, but it was Gaara in a sparkly blue belly showing top and tight leather pants! He also sported headphones with a microphone attached and a blonde wig…

"Um, Gaara…" began Naruto, trembling with fear "why are you in a Brittany Spears costume…?"

Suddenly a stage appeared beneath Gaara's feet and the room was filled with funky rainbow lights from a disco ball. Then… he began to SING!

"OOPS I DID IT AGAIN…" Gaara began.

"AHHHHH!!" screamed everyone, covering their ears at his horrible voice.

Then he did a little dance and the room returned to normal.

"That's 'Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN to you, mister!!" Gaara yelled at Naruto. "And I am in a Brittany Spears costume because I AM Brittany Spears!!"

He strikes a pose.

"But," Kiba began confusedly "how can you be Gaara, Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN, and Brittany Spears all at the same time?"

"I'm not!" Gaara/Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN/Brittany Spears stated simply "Or am I?"

Crickets chirp…

"Anyway," Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN began, suddenly transformed into a doctor, with a white coat, stethoscope, and the works "what's the problem?"

"TENDERS! NUGGETS! MATTRESS GIANT! THE HORROR!!!" screamed Lee, falling to the floor deliriously.

"… Could someone who's NOT crazy please explain?" Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN replied.

The room went quiet…

That's because the only one there who really WASN'T crazy (yet) was Tenten…

"Well," Tenten began, giving Neji and Shikamaru dirty looks "these two had a chicken war over which was better: McDonald's chicken nuggets or Burger King's chicken tenders… and well… they flooded the hospital with chicken and got us all banned for life!!"

"I see" stated Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN, stroking his beard (which suddenly appeared out of nowhere… no surprise) "well, the answer is simple. They are both the same."

"WHAT?!?!!" shouted Shikamaru at the top of his lungs.

"NO WAY!" screamed Neji, getting feisty.

"Yes way," Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN began his speech. "You see, chicken is chicken. Whether they are called nuggets or tenders does not make a difference. If I were to suddenly take over Burger King and change the name 'chicken tenders' to 'fried squash' it would still taste the same. So long as it is chicken it will taste like chicken, regardless of whether it is called squash or tenders, shaped like a finger or a turd, cooked in pig or rooster fat. Do not seek out your differences children. Find the things that make you alike. You are both chicken lovers inside. That's all that TRULY matters."

…

"You're…" Shikamaru starts.

"… right." Neji finishes.

The two Genin turn toward each other, look the other in the eye, and engage in a deep, emotional hug.

Everyone else is extremely creeped out and looks away.

"There you go," says Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN finally "problem solved!!"

"B- B- But" Tenten stutters, still in shock from all of the events of the day "what about Lee?"

Lee still lay on the floor, shaking and mutter something about the horrors of chicken war.

"Ah, this one," Dr. IamOFF THECHAIN said with a sigh "I'm afraid he may never eat chicken again. I'll send him to the psychological healing department right away."

He pressed a red button on the wall next to him and in came a stretcher carried by none other than…

"Itachi!! Kisame!!" Tenten yelped in surprise.

"Yes," began Itachi "we've turned over a new leaf."

"Now we work here at the Suna hospital in the psychological healing department," Kisame informed them.

"Uh… okay!!" Naruto said as if it were perfectly normal.

"Sasuke won't be happy about this…" Shikamaru said glumly.

The two former Akatsuki members carried Lee off and the remaining Genin (besides Gaara of course) were lead out the door. They paid to stay over night at a local Inn while they waited for Lee to recover. All the guys had to share one room while Tenten got her own (poop her). There was only one bed.

"I call bed!!" yelled Kiba and he ran over and began bouncing up and down on it. Naruto and Neji soon joined him, both claiming that THEY would have the bed. Actually Naruto said 'I will have this bed! Believe it!' and Neji retaliated by claiming that he was destined to sleep in the bed.

Then there was a random earthquake and the whole room shook. It wasn't THAT bad, but it was enough to send the three ninja flying off the precious array of pillows and sheets.

CRASH!!

"WAHHHHHH!!!" all three started crying like babies, even though all they had were bruises.

Shikamaru then pointed at them and laughed hysterically. "Three little monkeys jumping on the bed! All fell off and bumped their heads!!" (He was singing one of those sick nursery rhymes that make you wonder why mothers want their children to something involving monkeys becoming severely injured after innocently jumping on a bed)

While the three injured Genin cried and Shikamaru laughed his butt off, Shino snuck his bugs deep into the mattress and claimed it as his own 'cause well… none of them wanted it after that.

Later that night, after the sun had set, the four floor sleepers got out their sleeping bags and got ready for bed. Neji however, had no intention of sleeping just yet…

See he was still a little bitter about not winning the chicken fight. I mean, not that he lost, but he always liked to come out on top. Actually Shikamaru was quite the same way and at the sink they both had a toothpaste spit fight over it…

To make himself feel better, Neji brought out Tenten's book. For some reason he couldn't resist it. He couldn't resist her.

So he snuggled into his sleeping bag and switched on his flashlight. Then he eagerly turned to the next page of the book.

_Dear bookie,_

_Omg! Grandma's visit yesterday was a blast!! She's so awesome!! This time she taught me a thing or two about pandas. Boy she's crazy!! Heck she even gave me a "Panda Care Guide". Weird huh? She told me she took care of seven giant pandas once in the wild for four days and nights. She was hiding outside a village that had everyone on the lookout for her because she stole back one of the ancient scrolls they stole from her village. She couldn't start back home yet because they had the forest surrounded. So she had to patiently wait for a helicopter from her village to arrive and rescue her (she says it's a kind of ship that flies through the air that they have in China!!) Anyway, the pandas were injured (they were attacked by some sort of large animal) and she nursed them back to health. Isn't that awesome?_

_Anyway, gotta go, the 'rents are calling me down for dinner!! Oh and by the way, I have a HUGE secret to tell you tomorrow about… someone very special wink, wink_

_Love always,_

_Tenten_

Neji's heart was beating fast (partly because her grandma's freakishly impossible story had touched his heart and partly because he needed to know who the "special" person was and what Tenten had to say about them.

He turned the page…

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Okay, I'm back in business!! Yay!! i'll post the next chapter soon I PROMISE!!

Also, if you have any suggestions about anything I'll use them! And I love, love, LOVE to read your reviews, so keep 'em comin'!

Thanks a bunch for reading my fic!!

Oh yeah and if I'm spelling a name or something worng please tell me! Thanks!!


	6. Chapter 6: The Love Sickness

Hey guys! Thanks again for reading, even after I kinda ditched ya for a while…

Okay, here goes!!

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From last time…

Neji's heart was beating fast (partly because her grandma's freakishly impossible story had touched his heart and partly because he needed to know who the "special" person was and what Tenten had to say about them.

He turned the page…

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_Dear bookie,_

_Hi again!!! I'm sooo happy right now… know why? Because I'm always happy when I think about that "someone very special" I told you I'd tell you about him today. Okay well I'll give you some hints and then you have to guess who he is!!!_

_HINTS:_

_He's one of my team mates_

_He's quiet and lonely on the outside, but on the inside he's sweet and kind!!_

_He uses the Byakugan!_

_He's Hinata's cousin_

_His name starts with "N"_

_You got it! It's… Hyuuga Neji!! He's amazingly strong and brave! I'm actually probably the closest person to him… and he doesn't even talk to me that much! Well I mean sure he talks a lot more to me than other people and tells me all of his deepest thoughts and feelings but… still he's rather quiet. I train with him, like, constantly and we both really improve each others skill in battle, though he's never actually hurt me (physically). He really amazes me!_

Neji gaped a tthe open page. HE was the special somone!! And Tenten said he was strong and brave and amazed her!

_Anyway, today we trained some more and afterward he kinda looked at me funny and started trying to talk to me about something but he only just began to say something then decided against it, walking off mumbling. _

So she had noticed... a while ago Neji had tried to tell her something, some feeling he had about her inside of him, but he couldn't explain it... and didn't know if he was ready to tell her...

_I get the feeling there's something he's not telling me. But don't you worry, I'll find out I no time. After all I AM his most trusted friend (he told me once- isn't that sweet?!). He's gonna have to fess up sometime…_

_The funny thing is, everyday when we talk I wait hopefully and sure that he's gonna say it but he never does… he never says… the thing I most want him to say in the world. The thing I would do anything to hear pass his lips... _

Neji desperately wanted to know what this thing was. He read on.

_So anyways, bye!!_

_Love always,_

_Tenten_

_PS: I love Neji with all of my heart 3_

Neji reread this entry again and again. Ten times. The first time he had nearly missed the PS note. Thank god he hadn't… His heart was beating so fast it hurt…

REALLY BAD.

So bad that it caused the young ninja to jump out of bed screaming at the top of his lungs.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" screamed Neji, as he flew out of bed and started hopping around the room. He grabbed a nearby lamp and smashed right over a poor, terrified Kiba, who had been awaken by the Genin-gone-mad's high pitched shreeks.

In fact, everyone had been roused from their slumber and were now running around in sudden panic.

In the course of two minutes, Neji had successfully ripped the hotel room to shreds. He had smashed the bed, peed on it, and de-feathered the pillow (much to Shino's horror- he was an active pillow collector and dropped to the floor and rolled around in agony upon witnessing the tremendous disrespect to all pillow-lovers everywhere!!) Then Neji took all of the other boys stuff and threw it across the room, stuffing some of the stuff that interested him into his pocket. Then he smashed a huge hole in the wall and behold- Tenten stood there, in her pajamas, with her sleeping mask still over her eyes, standing there, mouth agape. She had just heard the commotion and jumped out of bed, running to the wall to see what she could hear, when Neji smashed through into her bedroom.

At the sight of Tenten Neji became even MORE delirious. He ran up and seized her, threw her over his shoulder and ran across the room shouting tribal mating calls. Finally he took out a few matches and lit five torches, circling Tenten with them. He stood in front of her, fists beating against his chest, still chanting.

Just then, Gaara er I mean Dr. IAMOFF THECHAIN, threw the door open (he heard the commotion all the way back at the hospital). As he entered the room, he did not look at all surprised to see the four shocked male ninja all huddled together, terrified in a corner (Shino was still rolling around on the floor muttering something about the great pillow god coming down and cursing them all), the equally perplexed konoichi surrounded by burning torches, and Neji acting like a crazy chimpanzee.

"Ah," the doctor sighed "as I thought. He's got the sickness."

Tenten gasped and grabbed Neji, wrapping her arms around his middle. "What sickness? Doctor, what's wrong with him?"

Tenten had calmed Neji down a bit with her touch and he was now only sorta of foaming at the mouth, still not responsive.

"Why, the Love Sickness of course!" stated Dr. IAMOFF THECHAIN with pride. "Nothing to worry about. ITACHI!! KISAME!! BRING IN THE POTION!"

The two hospital employees entered the room and handed him a vial filled with a strange pink potion.

Dr. IAMOFF THECHAIN walked over to Neji and poured the potion in his mouth.

After a few gulps, Neji looked up at them in a dizzy haze.

"What… what's going on?" he asked slowly.

"Ah, my lad," Dr. IAMOFF THECHAIN began, suddenly having a strange accent "it's jus' the Love Sickness takin' full affect on ya!!"

"Full affect?" Neji asked curiously.

Losing the accect, Dr. IAMOFF THECHAIN replied "Don't worry, it's all over. See whenever someone seeming to have no feelings falls madly in love, they go crazy for a little bit. That's all. Nothing serious."

"L-love?" Neji stuttered.

Tenten's eyes were downcast.

"_Well, you blew it!" Tenten told herself inside her mind. "You've missed your chance, he's fallen in love, probably with some beautiful blond nurse he met at the hospital… or worse… one of the guys!!!"_

She gulped loudly.

"Allrighty then, see ya in the morning!!" Dr. IAMOFF THECHAIN said cheerfully as he walked out the door.

Since there was now a huge gaping hole in the wall, Tenten watched Neji sleep. He was so peaceful when he sleeped.

SNORRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

"_Unlike SOME people!" _she thought, giving the sleeping Naruto and Kiba death glares.

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BACK IN KONAHA

Sakura sat on a bench in the middle of the park. She sighed and thought about Lee. He had always done everything in his power to protect her. He always said he loved her and was actually kind of cute, now that she thought about it…

"_NO WAY!!" screamed Inner Sakura. "He's LEE! You love Sasuke! SASUKE WOMAN!! Not that, thumbs up giving, green jumpsuit wearing, crazily obsessive dork!!"_

Then she thought about Sasuke. She'd had a cush on him for, like, ever. But he never once returned her feelings. He usually ignored her, even sometimes insulting her… They were friends, but nothing more, and she knew they never would be. She had wasted so many years of her life trying to win his heart… And she had been given Lee's the moment he'd met her. And now that she thought about it, Sasuke wasn't all that great anymore.

"Hey! Billboard Brow!" Ino was running toward her, looking flustered.

"What is it, Ino-pig?!" Sakura retorted.

"I.C. Yuin Thesh Ower! He's back!" said Ino, gasping for breath. She had clearly just run here at a brisk pace.

Sakura gasped in horror.

"He's invading Konaha again!! But this time it's worse! He's brought more of his 'Sneaky Peaky' ninja and they're all disconnecting the pipes so no one can use their showers! He's attempting to stink us all to death!!"

"We have to do something!!" Sakura replied in determination. If the other Genin could stand up to this guy, so could they!

"Yes," Ino replied "everyone's out battling- ninja of every rank are beating down the intruders as we speak! I was sent to find you by master Kakashi!"

"Let's go then!" Sakura said in haste, grabbing Ino's left arm and taking off toward the battle scene.

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Ha ha, okay! So… hoped you liked it, I'll post another chapter (sorry I know this one was boring) again soon! Bye!

PS: suggestions welcome


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